Whelp, "the Toyota" runs great but isn't working out. Rebranding Madison's car to 'the Camry' is like referring to her bedroom as the 'guest' room, same with her bathroom. Madi's bedroom will always be her room while we're living in this house. We gave away her bedroom set: it would seem weird to me walking past her room everyday with the visual appearance that she's just at her moms for the weekend. As quirky as it sounds, I do go in her room every morning and whisper g'morning Shug as I open her drapes, and g'night Shug as I close them. Her ashes are hung in a bag on the curtain rod, so it's light and bright during the day, dark at night... just how she liked it
We're selling Madison's car -not- only because it was hers but because we don't really like it. Yes, it has very low miles with a 100k extended warranty but being very tall, it's cramped. Add to that my observations are the people who drive one are mostly younger women. Madison wanted something fuel efficient, so we decided on a Camry. (She initially had a romance with the idea of a Prius... until she drove one : ) The vehicle I'd like to replace her car with would have an irresponsible amount of horsepower. The other car Angela and I have now is a Korean Lexus (actually a Hyundai Genesis), a 300 HP V6 and very comfortable full-sized car that scoots along nicely and gets great mileage considering its size. Personally I'd like an early 70's El Camino SS with a 454, but then I look at the chaps driving those and they're older dudes with ponytails. It's obvious most have no AC because I see their hair blowing around with the windows open on hot days, and these chaps are almost always driving alone. Ideally we get something Angela and I both would like... that isn't a convertible WV bug or some other 'chick' car. Angela's thinking a used two-seat Mercedes convertible, so we'll be finding common ground on something we can pretty much trade straight across for. Instead of an El Camino SS, perhaps Angela will go for an early 70s era Ranchero with a 427, 4 speed... but with AC!
On chordoma (more in the thread below): there's a young woman who recently passed away who had the same 1:20,000,000 rare sub-type that Madison had, poorly differentiated. She had been through the same (clinical) trials and tribulations as Madison, including the immunotherapy. She and I had exchanged emails when her treatments failed to suspend the progression of her disease, and she chose chemo as a last ditch effort. I'll never forget the absolute bravery Madison displayed when she chose not to try chemo in late 2017. Asking all of the right questions, the odds slowing down the progression were minimal, suspending the progression was 5%, and being curative prompted the discussion that "this disease will likely run it's course" conversation. I think the young woman who recently passed may have tried chemo as a last-ditch effort not only for herself, but perhaps for her family as well, the old 'fighting cancer' adage and 'not giving up 'the fight'. She did tell her dad that "you should really talk to Chris", and we'd spoken on the phone and emailed before her passing, and have emailed since. He'd written that he'll call in me the next week or two. His daughter's disease ran it's course too. There will be a point in time for all of us that we will face mortal death, and will need to come to terms with how we choose to stay/live factoring in both duration and quality of life remaining, and ultimately how/where we would like to 'go'. Angela and I squabble over who goes first, neither wanting to be the second to go. When it's time, perhaps we'll rent a plane and try and fly it upside-down through a barn "Second Hand Lions". Until that time comes and of the utmost importance, we've better learned how to live and to always have something fun to look forward to. Hashtag 'fun'. As we plan out next getaway, we determine the budget and duration. Puerto Vallarta is always nice, but we haven't been to Maui in years. Do we go to Hawaii for five days, or back to Mexico for 10? TBD... we may look for a cruise too.
We're selling Madison's car -not- only because it was hers but because we don't really like it. Yes, it has very low miles with a 100k extended warranty but being very tall, it's cramped. Add to that my observations are the people who drive one are mostly younger women. Madison wanted something fuel efficient, so we decided on a Camry. (She initially had a romance with the idea of a Prius... until she drove one : ) The vehicle I'd like to replace her car with would have an irresponsible amount of horsepower. The other car Angela and I have now is a Korean Lexus (actually a Hyundai Genesis), a 300 HP V6 and very comfortable full-sized car that scoots along nicely and gets great mileage considering its size. Personally I'd like an early 70's El Camino SS with a 454, but then I look at the chaps driving those and they're older dudes with ponytails. It's obvious most have no AC because I see their hair blowing around with the windows open on hot days, and these chaps are almost always driving alone. Ideally we get something Angela and I both would like... that isn't a convertible WV bug or some other 'chick' car. Angela's thinking a used two-seat Mercedes convertible, so we'll be finding common ground on something we can pretty much trade straight across for. Instead of an El Camino SS, perhaps Angela will go for an early 70s era Ranchero with a 427, 4 speed... but with AC!
On chordoma (more in the thread below): there's a young woman who recently passed away who had the same 1:20,000,000 rare sub-type that Madison had, poorly differentiated. She had been through the same (clinical) trials and tribulations as Madison, including the immunotherapy. She and I had exchanged emails when her treatments failed to suspend the progression of her disease, and she chose chemo as a last ditch effort. I'll never forget the absolute bravery Madison displayed when she chose not to try chemo in late 2017. Asking all of the right questions, the odds slowing down the progression were minimal, suspending the progression was 5%, and being curative prompted the discussion that "this disease will likely run it's course" conversation. I think the young woman who recently passed may have tried chemo as a last-ditch effort not only for herself, but perhaps for her family as well, the old 'fighting cancer' adage and 'not giving up 'the fight'. She did tell her dad that "you should really talk to Chris", and we'd spoken on the phone and emailed before her passing, and have emailed since. He'd written that he'll call in me the next week or two. His daughter's disease ran it's course too. There will be a point in time for all of us that we will face mortal death, and will need to come to terms with how we choose to stay/live factoring in both duration and quality of life remaining, and ultimately how/where we would like to 'go'. Angela and I squabble over who goes first, neither wanting to be the second to go. When it's time, perhaps we'll rent a plane and try and fly it upside-down through a barn "Second Hand Lions". Until that time comes and of the utmost importance, we've better learned how to live and to always have something fun to look forward to. Hashtag 'fun'. As we plan out next getaway, we determine the budget and duration. Puerto Vallarta is always nice, but we haven't been to Maui in years. Do we go to Hawaii for five days, or back to Mexico for 10? TBD... we may look for a cruise too.
Shifting gears: We still share custody of Bailey, M-F tour house and weekends at moms, just like Madi since late in high school. Angela and I decided to try a Rumba style sweeper, but an off-brand that was only $139 and came with a 30 day full refund if we're not thrilled. It wakes up at a pre-programed time daily, runs for two hours, then self-docks in the charging station (most of the time). Our house is always tidy, but with four pets that shed a lot this time of the year and with doors and our windows open, the hair and dust that it collects every day is amazing, and a fun dog toy too.
My mom found an outstanding nonprofit organization called the Conejo Valley Village, part of the Village to Village Network with the mantra being neighbors helping neighbors. For a nominal monthly fee, volunteers pick up elderly members and take them to doctor appointments, walk their dogs, help de-clutter their homes, host social events... dinners, various outings, and even happy hour gatherings. One of the volunteers recently sent an inventory of aged foods that she was tossing out from my mom's house, an impressive list (in a slightly disturbing way) but also being a fine example that she can get away with stuff that we 'kids' cannot with our elderly parents. Anne (the volunteer) and my mom were recently discussing the Marie Kondo 'joy' of tidying up, and pondering that my mom could get rid of some stuff. Angela and I had seen Marie Kondo's program on NetFlix, the mantra being if you have things that no longer bring you joy, thank them, then get rid of them. Angela was recently in Princeton for 10 days so I decided that was the time! I went through clothes and shoes that I'll no longer wear, and thanked each one for bringing me past joy, and then off to Good Will. Next, the pantry. I found stuff down low and way in the back that needed to go. There's Jambalaya, four boxes! Since the pantry would look very different when she got home, I prepped Angela letting her know that I'd tossed out some old stuff showing her this picture. She said pasta and rice is good for a very long time, but I told her that I thanked the Jambalaya before I tossed it, thanking each box for offering to feed and nourish us...
... when we were in our 40s. Huh, and actually I got away with it, thanks Marie!
And a special thanks and kudos to the Conejo Valley Village People for helping enable my mom and other senior members who can safely live alone by giving them a sense of independence from their dependents. Angela and I simply couldn't comfortably be away for weeks at a time without their dedicated volunteers and the tribal elders who keep it all together.
And a special thanks and kudos to the Conejo Valley Village People for helping enable my mom and other senior members who can safely live alone by giving them a sense of independence from their dependents. Angela and I simply couldn't comfortably be away for weeks at a time without their dedicated volunteers and the tribal elders who keep it all together.
